There and Back again
by Random-Nudey-Rudey-Fandoms
Summary: What would you do if you'd been given a second chance to live? Brooklyn Evangeline Oswald and her best friend Sansa Joanna Pond died in a car crash but someone has sent them to Middle-Earth. With a confusing prophecy and a slowly mending heart, will the two fulfil their task or will they fail? Fili/OC Kili/OC
1. Chapter 1

I own nothing except my OCs and the twists I put in the plot. Everything else is owned by J.R.R. Tolkien. 

**Chapter One:**

Dying.

Most people think that when they're dying, afterwards they are going to go to heaven or hell. Others believe that there is no afterlife. Some think you get reincarnated into a different form. I only believed that I would be greeted by my long-dead family, I had no idea what fate was twisting in store for me. That is of course, until I died.

My name is Brooklyn Evangeline Oswald and this is the story of how I got one more second chance.

#

The sweet fresh country wind raced past my face as I leant out of the window. "Brook! Get your melon back in the car before you crash this thing!" Sansa, my best friend since year 6 shrieked.

I laughed, popping my head back in and wound the window up. It was good to be back on home soil and taking a road trip.

Sansa Joanna Pond, she was always there for me when I needed her the most. She was my rock of hope and comfort when things got rough, and they have been rough.

After a minute of silence, I glanced over to see the fiery red-head reach into her duffle bag to grab a box. I raised my eyebrow at her antics, she only shook her head and pointed to the road, her green eyes full of excitement.

"You know how we used to film our lives a bit? Well, I decided that we should film our road trip so we can remember it forever. So, I got a dash board camera to film us driving! Everything that is filmed get automatically saved into our phones" Sansa giggled and carefully installed it onto the dash-board and turned it on.

"This is going to be the best road trip ever and afterwards we'll look back on our journey together!" I cheered and wound down the windows. The cool spring air whipped my dark mahogany hair back as I put aviators on over my dark whiskey coloured eyes and casually slung my arm out the window.

I realised we were both still dressed in our play clothes as we had gone straight on a road trip after starring in _Les Mis_. Sansa took this as a queue to turn on the radio.

_'__My friends are gonna be there too…_

_I'm on the highway to hell!_

_Highway to hell!_

_I'm on the highway to hell!_

_No stop signs,_

_Speed limit-'_

I frowned as Sansa changed the station, she only laughed and said "We can listen to AC/DC on the way back!" I was about to complain when she squealed and started singing along.

_"__Can you feel it? Now it's coming back we can steal it. If we bridge this gap, I can see you. Through the curtains of the waterfall!"_

When I realised that Geronimo by Sheppard was playing I sung along too.

_"__When I lost it, yeah you held my hand. But I tossed it, didn't understand, you were waiting as I dove into the waterfall!_

_So say Geronimo!_

_Say Geronimo. Say Geronimo. Say Geronimo. Say Geronimo. Say Geronimo. Say Geronimo._

_Can you feel my love?_

_Bombs away!_

_Bombs away-"_

"AHHH! BROOKLYN LOOK OUT!"

I turned to the right and saw a black truck barrelling towards us. It was making a beeline straight for our glossy jet-black '67 Chevy Impala. I turned the wheel to the left and slammed my foot harder on the accelerator. It was too late.

**_CRASH!_**

The impact of the collision sent us rolling down a small hill next to a dark forest. Time seemed to stop as shards of glass and shrapnel lodged themselves into my body. From the corner of my eye, I could see Sansa's mouth form into a silent scream.

All a sudden time fast forwarded and a blood-curling scream left my lips as we crashed to a rolling stop. We had landed upside down and I could see a pond and forest where the sky should be. I slowly undid my belt and crawled over broken shards of glass and sharp twisted bits of metal to get Sansa down.

"I'm so sorry Sansa" I whispered as I dragged her out of the car and leaned her on a boulder next to the pond. I glanced over to what was left of my baby and to my surprise, the dash-cam was still recording and it was trained on where we were resting. I looked up the hill to see a figure come running down with what looked like an AK-47 in his or her hands.

I gasped and stumbled backwards, it was the KGB assassin that everyone at work nicknamed '_the Ghost' _because of the fact that few knew if he was real because after all of his cases, he would disappear and would only re-surface for another case.

I reached into my back dress pocket and groped around for my specialised hand-gun that my workmates Maria, Phil, Clint and Tash got for me. I came back empty handed when I realised I only had my phone and solar powered charger on me since I put my gun in the glove box.

The Ghost walked around the remains of my car and pointed his AK-47 at me. He was going to murder Sansa too if I didn't do anything. "Please, kill me but not Sansa. Please, she's innocent" I begged making the Ghost stop.

I scanned his body and my eyes widened when I saw his metal arm with a red star tattooed to it. He wore black clothes and a black mouth piece. It also looked like he put on eyeliner but rubbed it around his eyes when it was still drying (making him look like a raccoon) and his dirty brown hair went just an inch above his shoulders.

My eyes met his and I saw cold calculating eyes that reminded me of a ruthless robot, trained to kill.

I kneeled next to Sansa who had rolled off the boulder and onto the side of the pond, I grabbed her hand and waited. I knew we were both going to die.

**_BANG! _**

**_BANG! _**

**_BANG!_**

I looked down at my chest to find three bullet holes with fresh dark blood streaming out of it. My eyes rolled into the back of my head and I fell backwards into the pond, dragging my dying friend with me.

######

Hi, this is my first Hobbit fanfic so please give me some feedback as I would really appreciate it and I have finished the second chapter. This will probably be the only time the Marvel universe will have a big part. I just wanted Brook to have a cool background. Thanks ~

Jennifer. R. R. Stannard


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two:**

I thought dying would hurt more like a bitch but it seemed that all pain had stopped the moment I was in the pond. It felt like I was floating in an abyss of comfort.

I could feel energy slowly gathering and growing inside my chest and I could feel the feeling returning back to my body as I could feel that my fingers were still laced tightly with Sansa's. My clothes, body and hair weren't wet even though we were in a pond and I started to worry, something was off. Just as I was about to open my eyes to see what was going on in the abyss, a voice startled me.

_'__Shhh… Do not fret young one. You have been sent here for a purpose for you have and your friend have been chosen to fulfil an ancient prophecy: _

**_Two souls, two hearts, one broken in half. _**

**_Two brothers, two princes, both soaring like finches._**

**_From the top of a pond they enter,_**

**_From beneath the Blue Mountains they adventure._**

**_Four to fall in love and dance in starlight forever._**

**_To save the line of Durin. _**

_My dear, I am Galadriel, the Lady of Lorien and we shall meet in Rivendell soon.'_

After the voice of Galadriel faded away, it felt like I chocking on water and a pain in my body started to spread from my chest to the tips of my toes and the top of my head. I could feel Sansa spasm beside me too. When it became too much to bare I opened my eyes.

I sat up as quick as lightening whilst gasping for air. I took deep breaths in to calm myself then I slowly turned to Sansa. She was awake but still a bit injured. I slowly staggered up, nearly falling but I regained my balance and bent down to help a dazed her up.

As she stood up to her full height I began to giggle and snort at the fact that she looked like a midget then I soon shut up when she told me that I looked around 4ft or 3ft 7.

"Sansa, what do you mean I'm approximately 4ft or 3ft 7? You look round about the same height too!" I gasped then yelped when I saw her ears, they looked like Bilbo Baggins' ears from the Hobbit movie!

Sansa took out her pocket mirror, inspected and shrieked in horror at her ears and threw the mirror into the air, which I caught and also found hobbit ears as a replacement for my human ears.

Sansa and I stared at each other then looked down at our feet, thankfully they were normal and we both sighed with relief. As Sansa started inspecting the rest of her body, I inspected our current location. We weren't at the place where we crashed, we were on the outskirts of a small village that had gorgeous, luscious green grass with rolling hills.

Noting that the sun was setting quickly I tugged on Sansa's arm to get her to follow me but a small whimper stopped me in my tracks. Sansa had taken one step and half collapsed because of a reopened wound on her leg. It seemed that the power in the pond had healed all my wounds and all of Sansa's except one. I slung Sansa's arm over my shoulder to help carry half of her weight and together we hobbled towards the village.

#

When we reached the village, it was notably quite dark and that was when we both realised where we were. The round doors and cute houses underneath the hills, we were in Hobbiton.

"This cannot be real, we died and now we are in Middle-Earth. This is not real… is it?" I asked Sansa.

"Well, the pain in my leg hurts like a bitch so this is most definitely real" Sansa returned, her green eyes wide and full of curiosity as she looked around in awe. We are both huge Hobbit and LOTR fans and living Australia made it quite easy to go to New Zealand to go on the tours they had over there.

"Sansa, as much as I would love to stand here with my mouth opened, attracting flies. You are still injured and we need to stitch that wound up" I scolded her for not worrying about her own health. I looked around for any welcoming houses but the people that looked out of their windows at us all closed their curtains muttering something about dwarves and I knew there was only one house we could go to.

"Sansa, we're going to find Bag End and get help there." I whispered and we hobbled in the direction where we could hear some familiar music.

_'__Blunt the knives and bend the forks! __Smash the bottles and burn the corks! __Chip the glasses and crack the plates! _

_That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!_

_Cut the cloth and tread on the fat! Leave the bones on the bedroom mat! Pour the milk on the pantry floor! Splash the wine on every door! _

_Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl; Pound them up with a thumping pole; And when you've finished, if they are whole, Send them down the hall to roll!_

_That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!'_

We were close enough to see the shadow of who I presumed to be Thorin Oakenshield, step inside Bag End after the song had finished. A few minutes later we finally got to the front round, welcoming green door. I took a deep breath and slowly raised my fist to pound on the door.

**_Knock _**

**_Knock _**

**_Knock_**

Sansa and I exchanged looks when we heard shuffling and someone (presumably Bilbo) go on about how Gandalf only said that there were to 13 dwarves coming. Before we knew it, the door had opened and we came face to face with Bilbo fucking Baggins. His frown and muttering about dwarves died when he laid eyes on us and were replaced with a worried expression.

"Um, how may I help you two?" He politely asked. Behind him, a small crowed of curious dwarves and a tall wizard had crept around the corner to watch the scene unfold. I forgot what I was going to say when I heard a whimper from Sansa who was clutching her wounded thigh.

"Please, my friend has been injured badly and we have no food, water or medical supplies. You're our last hope" I pleaded and with that Bilbo stepped aside and let us in.

"Follow me" He said and led us past the crowd of onlookers and into what I presumed was a guest room. Bilbo helped me gently lay Sansa down on the bed and asked what I would need to fix up the wound. "I need a sowing needle, clean thread, warmed wet towels and the strongest alcohol you've got. Oh and a leather belt." I rattled off.

Bilbo appeared back quickly with a needle and went to get a jug of alcohol. I grabbed the needle and speeded down the hall to the living room where most of the dwarves were. I ignored their curious and some hostile stares and threw the needle into the heart of the fire. I ignored the rising mutters around me and got a fire poker to get the needle out. I grabbed it, ignored the pain from the red hot needle and raced back to Sansa.

When I got there Bilbo was waiting with everything that I needed. I immediately set to work. I lifted Sansa's dress up to get to her thigh and got the towel soaked in warm water and got to work. Sansa's dress being so high up her thigh made Bilbo blush and cough awkwardly.

When I had cleared her wound and the area around it I got the leather belt from Bilbo and put it between Sansa's teeth so she could bite it. In the midst of doing that I forgot to give Sansa some alcohol to dumb her mind and instead I took a gulp of the honey coloured liquid, counted to three and poured it over her wound.

Sansa screamed so hard the leather barley muffled the sound and tried to leap off the bed so Bilbo had to hold her down. When Sansa stopped her scream and quietly sobbed I realised the whole house had gone quiet.

"The worst part is over Jo-Sa" I whispered to Sansa, Jo-Sa was her special nickname I gave to her in year six and I kissed her forehead. She nodded back with tears sliding down her face and teary eyes. I took the needle and thread and carefully stitched her up. She made tiny yelps and whimpers here and there and within two minutes the wound was nicely stitched up.

I took the belt out of her mouth and gave her the rest of the alcohol which she chugged down. I gave everything back to Bilbo and when I turned back around, Sansa was sleeping peacefully. "Thank you" I kissed Bilbo on his cheek and he led me to the kitchen to wash my bloody hands. I was busy in thought, thinking about what had happened that day that I didn't notice that someone had snuck in behind me.

"Kili, at your service" I jumped and turned around to a bowing dwarf. When he stood up to his full height I realised he was approximately 4ft 5, easily towering over my small 3ft 7 frame. My heart started racing as I realised he was much more handsome in real life than on screen. His warm chocolate brown eyes were twinkling with mischief, happiness and curiosity. His hair was an amazing shade of dark brown. I winced, suddenly remembered his death onscreen as I has seen The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies two days ago.

I realised he was waiting for my own introduction and started blushing as red as a tomato. "Err… Brooklyn Evangeline Oswald at your service!" I awkwardly curtsied as he smiled. "It's a pleasure to meet you Lady Oswald" and with that, the smooth motherfucker grazed his lips over my knuckles softly and gently tugged me to the direction of solemn humming.

We both entered the living room where everyone was sitting or standing around a glowing fire that casted dancing shadows around the room. Everyone looked at me still humming but Kili gently put his arm around me and I leaned into him. Then Thorin started singing softly and deeply.

_'__Far over, the Misty Mountains cold. To dungeons deep and caverns old. We must away, 'ere break of day. To find our long our long-forgotten gold. _

_The pines were roaring, on the height. The winds were moaning, in the night. The fire was red, it flaming spread. The trees like torches, blazed with light.'_

It was amazing standing there whilst listening to lost dwarves sing about their taken homeland. The shadows the fire casted danced everywhere and the fire's reflection sashayed in their eyes as I felt a strong urge to help them reclaim their homeland. I felt tears pricking my eyes as I empathized with Thorin and his company. I needed to help them reclaim Erebor, destroy Smaug and stop Thorin, Fili and Kili from dying too.

After a few seconds I realised that Thorin must have talked to Bilbo whilst I was washing my hands, fussing over a sleeping Sansa and stitching her up. I had lost our one way ticket to Thorin's company. _Shit. _

But then again, Sansa's health is my number one responsibility, number two is knowing more about this prophecy and that means finding Galadriel and lastly, number three is reclaiming Erebor. Number three will have to wait.

One by one the dwarves go retire for the night and I'm left leaning on Kili with Bilbo, Thorin, Fili, Balin and Gandalf still waiting in the room. I stood around awkwardly looking at my blood-splattered boots. They were my favourite boots, I frowned.

"I never did get your name" A curious voice interrupted my musings. "Oh, I'm sorry" I apologised. "I am Brooklyn Evangeline Oswald, at your service and my friend who was injured is Sansa Joanna Pond" I tried to gracefully curtsy but instead blushed at my own clumsiness.

"I'm Bilbo Baggins and you can stay the night Miss Oswald, there is a spare bed in the room where Miss Pond is currently resting" Bilbo said. And before Gandalf, Thorin, Fili, Kili or Balin could ask any questions, I had speedily walked out of the room mumbling a 'thank you' and 'goodnight'.

When I saw that no one was following me, I sprinted back to Sansa and closed the room door. I quietly tip-toed to the other spare bed and was about to hop in when Sansa stopped me.

"Hey Brook" Sansa greeted softly. I jumped over to her and inspected her wound. It was doing quite well.

"I'm so sorry. It was my fault he found us. I should have never joined SHIELD" I sobbed out to Sansa and begged for her forgiveness. "Hey, hey, hey. I forgive you and we should both be happy that we've been given a second chance. I still can't believe that I heard Thorin and the Company singing 'Far over the Misty Mountains cold' and we are in Hobbiton and we've met Bilbo" Sansa whisper – shouted.

"Well, _guten nacht _Brooklyn. _Guten nacht_" Sansa suddenly yawned out and I suddenly found it too hard to get up to my bed so I fell asleep leaning against Sansa's bed with her hand on my elbow.

"Good night Jo-Sa" I mumbled and I gladly let sleep take over me.

#

Prince Kili of Erebor, brother to the heir of Erebor- Fili and nephew to Thorin Oakenshield, King under the Mountain, crept into the room the She-Dwarves/Halflings were sleeping to check on them. He sighed and gently lifted up the sleeping brunette from the floor and set her onto the spare bed. He brushed her stray hairs off her face and pulled the blankets over her. Kili tip-toed back out but before he closed the door, he put a sack of coins next to a pair of boots that belonged to one of the women.

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Hi! Please rate and review it and do all that! Chapter 3 is currently in the making!

~ Jennifer. R. R. Stannard


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three:**

I groaned when someone started shaking me and I covered my eyes from the attacking sunlight. "Five more minutes" I mumbled and rolled onto my tummy, bringing the doona up over my head. "GET UP! BILBO'S GONE AND THE COMPANY TOO!" some horrible person screeched into my ear and proceeded to push me onto the floor. "Oof!" I thumped to the floor and opened one bleary eye, glaring at the loud red-head.

Sansa shook her head and started rambling on; "Bilbo left a note saying we could stay for a while but we should be gone before he comes back. He has left us some clothes too. He also left us some money and somebody else left a small money bag on your boots". I was slowly digesting everything then I jumped up, someone had put me in the bed because I fell asleep on the floor and that someone gave us some money and Sansa is way too cheery to be injured.

"Oh, and my injury has magically healed during the night so yeah" Sansa grinned and dragged me out to Bilbo's kitchen. "Here eat up, we're gonna get some ponies, food and a map. We need to be quick to catch up to Gandalf" She dumped a bowl of porridge in front of me.

I frowned, "Why are we going to see Gandalf" I asked dumbly with my mouth full of breakfast. "Gandalf is the only one who can help us with the prophecy and would know how we even got here in the first place. God, you really are slow in the morning" The red-head shook her head and started to get changed into some clothes that Bilbo lent us.

Sansa strutted in wearing a crème blouse, emerald waistcoat, tan breeches, black leather boots and a deep purple hooded travelling cloak with her ginger hair tied in a French braid. I wolf-whistled, grinning and she curtsied with a smirk. I then went and got changed into a navy blouse with dark brown suspenders holding them up, olive breeches, dark brown leather boots, a maroon travelling cloak and I left my wavy dark mahogany hair out. Sansa had stuffed our two travelling coats into a bag.

#

We had bought two ponies after bartering with a very plump Hobbit who eyed us curiously. We got two female Welsh ponies, one was fully chocolate brown with a rich black mane and tail and a pure white one with a light brown mane and tail. The white one was called Lady and was Sansa's and mine was called Nymeria.

After getting the ponies we raced over to Bree where I got a bow and arrow set, two silver daggers and two swords. One of the swords were for me, the bow and arrow too and a dagger whilst I gave Sansa a sword and dagger. Clint Barton one of my co-workers had trained me to use a bow and arrow whilst Natasha taught me a bit of fencing and hand to hand combat. I had passed some of my knowledge onto Sansa for her own protection. We also got food supplies and a map. Soon we were on our way.

#

We had been swapping between galloping and trotting to get closer to Thorin and the company. Sansa had memorised the track the company had taken in the book and so far we were on the right trail. We quickly stopped at a cave a little to the side of the path and agreed to use a fire only for cooking and straight after we'd put it out for fear that Orcs were nearby.

After eating our supper we unravelled our sleeping mats and put on our travelling coats. Mine was a deep amethyst colour whilst Sansa's was a deep ruby colour. We got out our cloaks and blankets and laid them on stop of us.

Sansa agreed to sleep first so I could take the first watch, I would wake her up around midnight so we could swap. The pale moonlight illuminated the forest so I could see quite a bit. Suddenly I heard a scream from over a few rocky hills away. I automatically grabbed my sword and Sansa clung on to me as she was woken up too.

"What was that?" She whispered, shaking. "That my dear friend, was an Orc. Since I remember it from the movie, it means that we are not too far behind the company so we can ask Gandalf to help us" I put it bluntly, searching for movement in the gloom. "I'll wake you up for your watch. Don't worry" I reassured her and slowly she fell asleep.

#

Later that morning I awoke to the smell of bacon and eggs sizzling. I sniffed the air and started drooling. "Mmmm…. Smells so nice. I need it inside me right now!" I groaned and then Sansa started snorted when my stomach rumbled, making me join in too. I got up and we scoffed our breakfast down then cleaned everything quickly in a nearby stream, afterwards we packed everything up and were well on our way.

#

Around midday Sansa piped up "So can you tell me the prophecy again and the whole story. I'm gonna write it down and solve it." I sighed, she already forced me to tell her the story again and again and _again._

"**_Two souls, two hearts, one broken in half. _**

**_Two brothers, two princes, both soaring like finches._**

**_From the top of a pond they enter,_**

**_From beneath the Blue Mountains they adventure._**

**_Four to fall in love and dance in starlight forever._**

**_To save the line of Durin. "_**

I finished off and told her about the pond and Galadriel's message to me. Sansa nodded and furiously scribbled everything with her tongue poking out of the side of her mouth.

All a sudden Lady stumbled over a tree root and Sansa fell off onto a pile of maple leaves. I started laughing and stopped the horses and jumped down to help Sansa up. She pulled my down making the two of us shut up, she started giggling and soon the both of us were clutching our stomachs laughing so hard. It was good to joke during a serious time.

#

"Are we there yet?" Came Sansa's snarky question.

"No"

"Are we there yet now?"

"WILL YOU SHUT UP WITH THE QUESTIONS?" I shouted at Sansa, very annoyed with the fact that she had been asking the same question for hours on end. The sun was starting to set quickly and I really wanted to find the company and Gandalf soon before we camp.

_"On the road again… I can't wait to get on the road again!"_

Sansa started whistling after quoting Donkey.

"Shut up! Wait! I think that's the abandoned farm that the company should be camping at!" I joyfully exclaimed and nudged Nymeria into a gallop. When we got up at the farm there was no one in sight. Bags were open and it seemed like the dwarves were probably with the three dumb trolls. And here I was hoping that we wouldn't have to face trolls and grumpy dwarves in sacks. We quickly tied Lady and Nymeria up and got our weapons.

#

We swiftly ran into the forest and silently crept around the corner to see a little clearing so see 13 dwarves and a hobbit undressing getting shoved into huge burlap sacks. I couldn't help but notice the fine-ass muscles rippling in Kili's arms and back as he stripped then I started blushing when I realised that I shouldn't be have been staring at him the first place.

"We should do something" I whispered and looked at over to Sansa. She nodded and shoved me towards the trolls with a smile on her face. My face paled, I was used to killing people not bloody trolls! The closest thing to a troll that I've had to kill was a huge buff Russian guy whom I barely escaped from with a broken arm, fractured collar bone and ribs oh, and a broken nose and wrist too. I shook my head and mouthed no with wide brown eyes.

During our mini scuffle on who was going to save the company, we hadn't noticed but a troll, specifically the one that sneezed on Bilbo in the movie had found us. "OI BURT! Look over 'ere! Look what I found! It's another one of them burglar 'obbits!" Dumb 1 yelled to Dumb 2 and Bert. That was when we charged.

"GERONIMOOOOOO!" Sansa yelled with her sword in hand slashing at Dumb 1's leg. I ducked and slid under his legs and shot an arrow at who I presumed was Bert. "OW!" I grinned and ran to Sansa.

"I'll distract them while you untie the dwarves" I whispered and we swung into action. I distracted the three idiots with arrow after arrow. I saw that Sansa had snuck behind the lumbering trolls and was making her way to the sacks full of dwarves. Dumb 2 tried to make a grab at me but I quickly sliced his finger off. I grinned, adrenaline was pumping through me and it felt like I was on another normal case.

"Lay down your arms or we'll rip her's off!" I heard Bert yell. I turned around and to my horror, Sansa had been caught by Bert and Dumb 1 and they hand one hand each on her arms and I knew if I didn't surrender they would tear her to pieces. I scrunched my nose up in distaste and bitterly threw my sword, bow and arrows and my dagger to the ground.

Next thing I knew, I was being held by Bert and dangled upside down. "This one's different. It's got more hair than the burglar 'obbit but it ain't got big feet" Bert exclaimed and sniffed me. "I'm a lady you idiotic dickhead!" I screeched and tried to punch and claw at his hand.

I was then dropped to ground. "Take your clothes off and get into the sack" Dumb 2 ordered. My face went tomato red with fury, "I will not take my clothes off! I am a respectable lady and I will not strip" I was trying to delay them, I really didn't have a problem with stripping since some of my cases involved it. "Do it or we'll sit on your friend here and squish her into jelly" Bert threatened. Before the company could close their 'innocent' eyes, I already had my olive breeches off and was about to take my blouse off when I was quickly stuffed into a sack and thrown off to the side.

"ARGH!" I squealed and I heard an 'oof' in front of me as I knocked the wind out of some poor dwarf before rolling off said dwarf. My face heated up as I realised my face had landed inches away from someone's crotch. I slowly lifted my head up to see shocked warm brown eyes staring back at me.

Of course I would land with my face next to Kili's crotch. I started wiggling to try to get away from the slowly rising tent, but I failed miserable and found myself a centimetre closer.

I decided to break the awkward silence, "You know, usually I'd go on a few dates with a guy before we get to this stage" I joked but it just made Kili blush harder and Fili and Bofur snigger. Just as I was about to roll away, another flying burlap sack was on a collision course with me.

Luckily, instead of Sansa crashing into me, she had crashed into Fili who next to Kili. "Sorry!" I heard her apologize and she started wriggling around to move away. I had somehow managed to get into a non-awkward position when I heard Bilbo's voice shout out, "Wait! Wait!" Bilbo hobbled up onto his feet, "You are making a terrible mistake!" he said breathlessly.

"You can't reason with them laddie- they're halfwits!" Dori called out to Bilbo. "Halfwits?" Bofur yelled out, "What does that make us?" Bilbo hobbled a little bit forward, "I meant with the, uh, with the seasoning." Bert looked confusion and walked forwards a step to the smart Halfling, "What about the seasoning?"

"You are going to need something a lot stronger than sage to cook up this lot up!" Bilbo lied. "You're a traitor Baggins!" Someone yelled out and tried to kick him. "What do you know about cooking dwarf?" Dumb 1 questioned. "Shut up. Let the, uh, flurgaburburrahobbit talk." Bert scolded and slapped Dumb 1 on the head.

"Well, the secret to cooking dwarf is-um…" Bilbo trailed off thinking. "Yes? Come on, tell us the secret!" An impatient Bert butted in. "Um, yes, I'm telling you, the secret is… the secret is to skin them first!" Bilbo exclaimed. Straight after Bilbo said that, the pile of dwarves that I was on went chaotic, they were kicking each other and yelling threats and insults at Bilbo.

Bert deemed the secret a good one to try and told Dumb 2 to get his filleting knife. "What a load of rubbish! I've eaten plenty with their skins on. Scuff 'em I say, boots and all!" Dumb 2 argued back and that's when I saw a shadow moving behind some trees. It was Gandalf to the rescue and I could see that Bilbo had seen him too. When I tuned back to the trolls, Dumb 1 had dangled Bombur over his mouth and was about to eat him.

"Not that one! He's infected!" Bilbo yelled out and that's when the fun started. "He's got worms in his… tubes!" Bilbo ducked when Bombur was thrown on top of Fili and Sansa. I started giggling but hid it as coughs. "In fact they all have it, they're all infected with parasites. It's a terrible business; I wouldn't risk it, I really wouldn't"

The party then got started and I started sniggering quietly. "Parasites! Did he say parasites?" Oin yelled out angrily. "We don't have parasites! You have parasites!" I heard Kili shout loudly from above me. After that, every dwarf chimed in about how they didn't have parasites and they only shut up and realised Bilbo's plan when Thorin nudged them not so gently.

"I've got parasites as big as my arm!" Oin exclaimed. "Mine are the biggest parasites! I've got huge parasites" Kili yelled out and then everyone else did too about how they have parasites as big as a Nicki Minaj's arse. Well, they didn't compare them to Nicki's arse but it was quite an amusing show. Too bad I didn't have any popcorn with me.

"What about the lady flurgaburburrahobbit?" Bert asked and lifted me up and dangled me over his awaiting jaws, making me squeak and squirm in his hand. "Oh, she has the worst parasites and she's also riddled with fleas and lice" Bilbo came to the rescue. Bert threw me down on Kili and this time, not near his crotch.

"Oof!"

"Sorry!" I apologised after knocking the wind from Kili again. What is it with landing near or on Kili? We both stared for a moment and only tuned in when Dumb 2 got the gist of Bilbo's plan.

"You think I don't know what you're up to? This little ferret is taking us for fools!" Dumb 2 exclaimed making Bilbo squeak out "Ferrets?"

"The dawn will take you all!" Gandalf suddenly appeared on a large boulder. 'Who's that, no idea and can we eat him too?' were the last words the three smelly and idiotic trolls ever said as Gandalf struck his staff onto the boulder making it crack in half, letting sunlight in.

In a mere matter of seconds, the trolls had turned to stone with screams of pain and agony making the dwarves cheer except Dwalin on the turning spit who complained of someone's foot in his back.

######

I hope you enjoyed this chapter as I know I sure did. Chapter 4 is being written right this moment. My beta has noticed that I have adopted the R. R. from Tolkien. George. R. R. Martin adopted it as homage to J. R. R. Tolkien so I decided to do the same. Please rate and follow and give me some feedback.

~ Jennifer. R. R. Stannard


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Gandalf quickly helped Bilbo out of his sack and the both of them proceeded to help everyone else out except Sansa and I. The dwarves who were out gave each other a hand and shot us both curious looks. Dwalin had untied Thorin who in turn pushed me off Kili and then proceeded to roll Sansa off Fili too.

"That was rude" Sansa huffed and glared at the retreating figure of Thorin. "Stupid dwarf king under the mountain and his goddam ego" Sansa sneered, shooting daggers at anyone who decided to look at us with a cold gleam in their eye.

#

The company had ignored us in stuffy burlap sacks for far too long and when they were all wearing their clothes I snapped. "Has anyone here considered getting an operation? Because YOU ALL HAVE HUGE STICKS SHOVED FAR UP YOUR ARSE! Didn't your mother ever tell you to help women or at least be polite or did your manners get left behind with her? GOD! And I thought chivalry wasn't dead!"

I was still rambling on about rude Middle-Earth males were that I didn't notice a tall shadow fall upon Sansa and I.

"And why should we help you?" A deep baritone voice asked, I looked up and was met with one of the coldest stares I had ever seen. Thorin's icy blue eyes held curiosity, disgust and a teeny weeny bit of worry, in turn I glared at him with all the anger I could muster.

"As you can see, my un-biological sister and I are still half-naked in stuffy and itchy sacks. So if you could get off your high horse and help us that would be deeply appreciated" I sweetly asked with sarcasm underlying my words. Thorin's eyes turned into a stormy ice cold blue tempest and was about to open his mouth when Sansa, sensing a verbal fight arising, stopped him.

"What Brooklyn here meant was that we would love it if you could help us because we're sorta in a rush and we really need to speak with Gandalf. Right Brooklyn?" Sansa nudged me and smiled innocently at Thorin. "What she said" I quickly put in.

Thorin pondered for a moment and turned to look at Gandalf who nodded his head, his light blue eyes full of wisdom scanning us with a child's curiosity. "Fili, Kili. Untie the two girls" Thorin curtly ordered and in a flash Kili was untying me and Fili was helping Sansa out.

Sansa and I just got out of the burlap sacks when Ori blushed a vibrant shade of pink along with Fili, Kili and Bilbo. Bofur grinned and winked at us and Thorin coughed awkwardly while the rest of the dwarves shuffled around, looking at their worn out boots. "What?" I questioned and crossed my arms in front of me, making my blouse ride up to my panty line. "You might want to get some clothes on lass" Balin finally said, shaking his head.

'Oh' I mouthed and together Sansa and I went hunting for the rest of our clothes. As fast as lightning, I already had my olive breeches back on along with dark brown suspenders and boots on whilst Sansa was just buttoning up her emerald waistcoat over her crème blouse and tan breeches.

"You can look now" I said dryly with a smirk on my face. Sansa grabbed my arm and started dragging me along to Gandalf and apologised as we shoved past Nori and Dori.

Gandalf was awaiting us with Thorin at his side, both pairs of eyes holding curiosity, I was about to open my mouth to blabber our story to Gandalf the Grey when Sansa cut in. "We'd like to speak to Gandalf alone…please" Sansa added as an afterthought.

Thorin huffed grumpily and was about to argue back when Gandalf placed an aging hand on Thorin's shoulder and gave him a look. It was the type of look a parent would give to a small, unco-operating child. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop myself from sniggering at Thorin's face, it was priceless.

When Thorin wasn't in hearing range of us Sansa got started. "Mithrandir" She breathed and curtsied, "it's an honour meeting you". Gandalf the Grey titled his head to the side, studying us both, "it's my pleasure too" he concluded, thinking deeply.

"Please, we need your help with a few things" I pleaded, snapping Gandalf out of his trance. "Yes, yes. But first I have a few questions of my own" His sky blue eyes twinkled and he smiled. Sansa and I both nodded, it was only fair we answered his questions too.

"First question, what race may you be of? You have a hobbit's ear but your feet rule you out as a female hobbit. You are short like a dwarrowdam but you don't have a beard. You can't be a short human so _what_ _are you_?" Gandalf tilted his head again, puzzled with his bushy brows furrowed.

"Well, we were human so I guess now we are a bit of dwarf and hobbit? Hence the shortness and ears" I answered frowning, scanning Sansa's ears.

"Second question, are you from Middle-Earth? You must answer this truthfully _Brooklyn_, _Sansa_." Gandalf tested out our names and watched us like a hawk. "We aren't from Middle-Earth Mithrandir. We come from an entirely different universe where all this is fictional. You are a fictional character and everything, this whole quest is a children's book. I've read the book, actually, we both have read it and are big fans of Middle-Earth so we basically know how this adventure is going to end…" Sansa rambled on, not noticing Gandalf's wide eyes when she mentioned that we knew how the quest was going to end.

"Hmm… A prophecy, Rivendell, Lady Galadriel… I see. I do believe you two. Third question, how would you like to join the company of Thorin Oakenshield?" Gandalf asked, his light blue eyes twinkling with humour, knowledge and a not yet satisfied curiosity.

"Wait a sec" I questioned, "We, Sansa and I join Thorin's company to reclaim Erebor and defeat Smaug and what not? HELLS YEAH!" I cheered excitedly and grinned at Sansa who was smiling like Gandalf had offered her a shirtless Legolas, Fili _and _Frodo. Sansa has huge crushes on the three hotties.

"Good, well you must sign the papers of course and meet everyone" Gandalf boomed and led us back to a pacing Thorin. "Everyone, meet the new members of our company!" Gandalf exclaimed excitedly and nudged us to Balin who was getting out a spare contract.

Sansa and I hurriedly signed the contract before Thorin could tell us off. "Welcome to the company of Thorin Oakenshield, Lady _Sansa, _and Lady _Brooklyn_" Balin bowed and tested out our names, worried if he got them wrong. "Please, call me Brooke and she's just Sansa" I smiled warmly. I always liked Balin, he reminded me of a non-perverted version of Santa, well, Father Christmas and he was also like that cool grandpa you'd have.

"A quest as dangerous as this is no place for women let alone a lost hobbit!" Thorin yelled and stalked over to Sansa and I, fury etched in the blue fires of his eyes. "They already signed it Thorin. They're part of the company now" Balin tried to calm Thorin but it didn't work.

"They will prove to be helpful in the future. I need them Thorin Oakenshield, to help with this quest and without them we would fail!" Gandalf exaggerated and had a stare down with Thorin. Gandalf obviously won.

"I trust your opinion Gandalf but do tell me, _why _do you need them?" Thorin finally answered. "That remains between Brooklyn, Sansa and I" Gandalf said, awaiting any more disagreements from Thorin, they were none.

"Do you two have any knowledge of how to use weapons?" Thorin asked, even though he obviously knew the answer was yes but that didn't seem to sit well with him because Sansa and I were seen as a 'burden' and 'damsels in distress'. Luckily for Thorin, someone butted in and spared him from an earful of rude, ego damaging comments from Sansa and I.

"Didn't you see the way they handled their weapons? They looked like they were quite good" Gloin rumbled, looking at Sansa and I with some form of respect, even Oin, Bifur and Nori nodded too.

"I have been trained to use a swords a bit, bows and arrows and a few other weapons. I'm okay with the bow and arrow as I was taught by the best- Clint Barton but I am a bit rusty. Oh, and I also know mixed martial arts and hand to hand combat, well they're really the same thing anyway. I was trained by another colleague- Natasha Romanoff" I spoke with my hand on my hip and I raised an eyebrow, waiting for Thorin to say something.

"I have been trained with the sword, throwing knives and hand to hand combat and mixed martial arts. I was trained by Brooke and one of our best friends- Natasha Romanoff." Sansa added and together we watched Thorin with smirks.

Thorin sighed, "Very well, but if you two get killed it is not our fault and if you get injured we are leaving you at the first town we stop at. Fili, Kili. You two are in charge of looking after the two" He ordered and stalked off to look at the stone trolls.

"Shouldn't you introduce yourselves?" Gandalf merrily chuckled at the silent and shocked company.

"Well, as you know I'm Balin that's Thorin, whom you've already spoken to and that's my brother Dwalin" Balin stated and Dwalin nodded curtly in the corner, he looked so rough and dangerous but his eyes were kind.

"I'm Gloin and that's Oin" Gloin, the father of Gimli said and pointed to a dwarrow with white hair.

"I'm Bofur!" The toy maker greeted cheerily.

"Bombur and that's Bifur" Bombur exclaimed after Bofur introduced himself. Bifur muttered a few words in Khuzdul and I couldn't help but stare with wide eyes at the axe stuck in his head.

"Nori!"

"Dori!"

"And I'm Ori!" Ori came up and shook our hands after his family had introduced themselves separately. Sansa and I both smiled warmly, Ori was so adorable and he was definitely one of our favourite dwarves. I felt sorry that I ruined his virgin eyes by walking half-naked around him.

"Fili"

"And Kili"

"At your service!" The two line of Durin hotties both bowed and Kili took my hand into his hand and softly grazed his lips over my knuckles, his gorgeous molten chocolate eyes never leaving my surprised dark whiskey coloured ones and making my heart skip a beat. From the corner of my eye I could see Fili doing the same to Sansa. Damn they were smooth, I'm as smooth as crunchy peanut butter myself but damn the princes of Durin were something else entirely! I started blushing and shyly withdrew my hand with a small smile and I heard Sansa giggle like a love-struck school girl beside me.

"You said you thought chivalry was dead here but I'm showing you it isn't" Kili smirked cheekily along with Fili.

"And you also said that we needed an operation to get the sticks that are shoved, and I quote, far up our arses out, because they seem to have made us leave our manners behind at the Blue Mountains" Fili added smugly, his baby blue eyes full of laughter, making the whole company laughed except Thorin cause he's always grumpy.

Sansa and I snorted at that and we both apologised. "Although you really should see Sansa when she's in a mood. She's got the temper and wild words to match her hair" I joked and Sansa playfully punched me.

"Enough, we have more important matters to discuss" Thorin's deep baritone voice boomed over the chuckles of the company.

The company parted to let Thorin stride through, "Where did you go, if I may ask?" he asked Gandalf, still grumpy about Sansa and I joining his men. "To look ahead" Gandalf casually answered.

The two started moving towards the stone trolls. "What brought you back?" Thorin asked, placing a hand on a frozen Bert. "Looking behind. Nasty business. Still you are all in one piece" Gandalf reasoned and flashed a toothy grin at Bilbo, Sansa and I.

"No thanks to your burglar and two _girls_" Thorin spat out, locking my eyes with a snow storm inside his.

"He had the nous to play for time. None of the rest of you thought of that and Brooklyn and Sansa came up with a good plan so you can't blame them for trying" Gandalf rolled his eyes as Thorin snapped out of his staring contest with me to gaze at Gandalf, looking repented.

Gandalf got his staff and poked the stone troll with it, "They must have come down from the Ettenmoors". I tuned out at that and scanned the clearing for any signs of Sansa and I's weapons. I frowned as I couldn't see anything and jutted my bottom lip out. I looked up at the sound of Sansa laughing at something that Fili and Bofur had told her. A small smile graced my lips and my heart swelled with happiness, Sansa was happy here so I'm happy here.

I felt someone's gaze on the back of my head and I swung around, ready to give someone an earful if they were being rude. "What?" I asked and looked into the dark chocolate currants swirling inside Kili's eyes. He just chuckled and shook his head, "What were you thinking about?"

"I-I was wondering where my weapons were" I stuttered and tried to calm my beating heart, this was the first time this had happened after… After the accident. It was still a sore subject.

"We have your two swords and two daggers but your bow and arrow didn't survive" Kili said sincerely and held out my weapons. "Thanks Kili" I smiled at him and took the weapons and gave Sansa back her sword and dagger. When I turned back, Kili had struck up a conversation with his brother and Sansa was still joking with Bofur. I sighed and from the corner of my eye, I saw Bilbo shuffling in the corner alone. At least there is someone I can talk to.

When I started walking up to him, I saw his eyes light up with recognition, he was really the only person except Gandalf and maybe Balin that remembered that Sansa and I were the two ladies that came to him for help. "Brooklyn right? The same Brooklyn that come to Bag End with an injured friend right?" I nodded and smiled in thanks as Bilbo was a great person for helping injured strangers.

"I just wanted to say that Sansa and I will be in debt to you and thank you for being so nice and helping us out. Thank you for the money and the spare clothes. We locked the door at Bag End so no one should be able to get inside" I rambled on and then kissed his cheek in gratitude, making him blush as red as a beetroot.

"Ooh, getting a bit comfy with the Halfling are we lass?" Bofur joked and I childishly stuck my tongue out at him making the toy maker chuckle. "I think she just likes her men without a lot of hair!" Sansa chimed in cheekily and winked at me and I felt a faint blush appear on my cheeks.

"Kili, you better watch out! Mr Boggins here might just steal your girl!" Fili burst out laughing, clutching his stomach at Bilbo, Kili and I's faces. Bilbo frowned but let a chuckle escape whilst Kili and I were standing with our mouths wide open with faces as red as a Baboon's arse. The whole company erupted into laughter and Sansa was chortling.

Everyone was still giggling except for Bilbo, Kili and I as we were studying our boots or in Bilbo's case his hairy feet. Gandalf was talking to Thorin about how the trolls couldn't have moved in daylight when Thorin suddenly exclaimed, "There must be a cave nearby!"

#####

Sorry about the short chapter! I've been a bit busy with family drama. I'll be going on holiday to my Grandparent's house in a few days and that means no internet but, the area where they live reminds me of Middle-Earth. The lake there is like the lake where Lake Town use to be and the hills remind me of the shire. The bush there could be Mirkwood forest so I'll have a lot of inspiration! But don't worry for I'm not going until Wednesday!

~ Jennifer. R. R. Stannard


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Everyone, get on to your ponies and move quickly! Dwalin, scout ahead for any sign of a troll cave!" Thorin ordered and quickly gathered his belongings just as Dwalin jumped onto his pony and started scouting ahead.

Everyone else trampled through the undergrowth back to the abandoned farm, muttering under their breath as Sansa and I followed from behind.

_"__Mine's a tale that can't be told, my_ _freedom I hold dear.  
>How years ago in days of old, when magic filled the air.<br>T'was in the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair.  
>But Gollum, and the evil one crept up and slipped away with her, her, her...yeah.<em>

_Ramble On, And now's the time, the time is now, to sing my song.  
>I'm goin' 'round the world, I got to find my girl, on my way.<br>I've been this way ten years to the day, Ramble On,  
>Gotta find the queen of all my dreams."<em> I sung under my breath, hoping nobody but Sansa and myself could hear. I hummed the rest of the song and tapped my thigh to the beat not noticing that two princes, a philosopher and a toy maker could hear me.

"You've got a beautiful voice lass" Bofur commented nonchalantly, fiddling with his pipe and I blushed, flattered. Just as I was about to thank him Sansa jokingly butted in, "You shouldn't have said that, now her ego is inflating more!"

Everyone within hearing range chuckled and I was about to answer back to Sansa with a witty remark when Thorin ordered us to gather our belongings quickly and jump onto our ponies within three minutes or else we'd be left behind. Sansa and I had left our bags next to Lady and Nymeria and all we had to do was strap them onto our ponies and then up we went too, we were the first ones ready.

#

Everyone was now ready and we were trotting slowly towards the troll cave that Dwalin had located, it was fifteen minutes away from the clearing. Sansa and I were at the back with Ori, Bofur and Bilbo in front and Fili and Kili to our sides.

"Won't you sing a song for us lass?" Bofur grinned and he swivelled around to face me. I was lost for words. "Why don't you sing _Waltzing Matilda _or _Unconditionally_?" Sansa questioned and raised a fiery red eyebrow.

The words came out of my mouth before I could stop myself:

_"__You're just a small bump unborn  
>In four months you're brought to life<br>You might be left with my hair  
>But you'll have your mother's eyes<em>

_I'll hold your body in my hands be as gentle as I can But for now you're scan of my unmade plans  
>A small bump four months you are brought to life<em>

_And I'll whisper quietly  
>I'll give you nothing but truth<br>If you're not inside me  
>I'll put my future in you<em>

_You are my one, and only  
>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb<br>And hold me tight  
>You are my one, and only<br>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb  
>And hold me tight<br>And you'll be alright_

_You're just a small bump I know  
>You'll grow into your skin<br>With a smile like hers  
>And a dimple beneath your chin<br>Finger nails the size of a half grain of rice  
>And eyelids closed 'till they soon opened wide a small bump<br>In four months you'll open your eyes_

And I'll hold you tightly  
>And tell you nothing but truth<br>If you're not inside me  
>I'll put my future in you<p>

_You are my one, and only  
>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb<br>And hold me tight  
>You are my one, and only<br>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb  
>And hold me tight<br>And you'll be alright_

_And you can lie with me  
>With your tiny feet when you're half asleep<br>I'll leave you be  
>Right in front of me for a couple weeks<br>So I can keep you safe_

_'Cause you are my one, and only  
>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb<br>And hold me tight  
>You are my one, and only<em>  
><em>You can wrap your fingers round my thumb<br>And hold me tight  
>And you'll be alright<em>

_'Cause you were just a small bump unborn  
>For four months then torn from life<br>Maybe you were needed up there  
>But we're still unaware as why"<em>

When I finished I didn't know but subconsciously I put my right hand over my abdomen, I felt tears pricking in the corner of my eyes. I could still hear the screams, smell the smoke and feel the knife, the ever so sharp, glinting knife… And him. I had re-opened wounds that I have so desperately tried to heal.

"You never sing that song. Why now?" I glanced up and saw Sansa's worried green eyes, she was right, why now? After all this time and why now? One of my best friends from University wrote the song for me, after the accident. I miss Ed.

"You have a lovely voice lass. I would ask what the story behind the song is but I can see that it is still a sore subject. Some wounds never heal" I turned my head forward and saw Balin smiling at me with sad ancient eyes full of wisdom. He obviously had some idea about the re-opened wound.

"Maybe we could sing a song in return or Sansa can sing?" Fili offered, his baby blue eyes sparkling with the happiness of thinking of a good idea to break the awkward silence.

"Sure" Sansa replied, I could feel her gaze burn on my back. Kili had trotted up next to me and took my dainty but strong hand into his calloused ones.

"You okay Brooklyn?" Kili's molten chocolate eyes immediately made me feel better, he looked so sincere and worried. I nodded my head smiling a small sad smile and gently squeezed his hand.

_"__Ahhh Hmhmhmm_

_Dreams are like angels  
>They keep bad at bay<br>Love is the light  
>Scaring darkness away<br>I'm so in love with you  
>Make love your goal<em>

_The power of love  
>A force from above<br>Cleaning my soul  
>Flame on burn desire<br>Love with tongues of fire  
>Purge the soul<br>Make love your goal_

_l'll protect you from the hooded claw  
>Keep the vampires from your door<br>When the chips are down I'll be around  
>With my undying death-defying love for you<br>Envy will hurt itself  
>Let yourself be beautiful<br>Sparkling light, flowers and pearls and pretty girls  
>Love is like an energy<br>Rushing in, rushing inside of me, hmm..._

_The power of love  
>A force from above<br>Cleaning my soul  
>Flame on burn desire<br>Love with tongues of fire  
>Purge the soul<br>Make love your goal_

_This time we go sublime  
>Lovers entwined divine, divine<br>Love is danger, love is pleasure  
>Love is pure, the only treasure<br>I'm so in love with you  
>Make love your goal<em>

_The power of love  
>A force from above<br>Cleaning my soul  
>The power of love<br>A force from above  
>A sky scraping dove<br>Flame on burn desire  
>Love with tongues of fire<br>Purge the soul  
>Make love your goal<em>

_Make love your goal"_

Fili started clapping with a huge toothy grin on my face which made Sansa awkwardly bow in her saddle. The jokes lifted the dampening mood that I had left behind and soon others were cracking a smile and I softly wolf whistled, making Sansa blow me a kiss.

Fili frowned, "How come I don't get a kiss?" he teased and to his surprise he did get a kiss. Sansa leant into Fili, seductively looking at him beneath her full eyelashes. She bite her lip then gave Fili a quick peck and quickly like the kiss, slapped his horse's rump, making it gallop over to Thorin and Gandalf at the front.

Everyone who had witnessed the scene started laughing their heads off. Bombur's booming laugh got Gandalf and Thorin's attention and when they looked at the rest of the company they saw dwarves bowling over and wiping tears from their eyes and saw a very red faced Fili.

Gandalf chuckled whilst Thorin looked unamused, not getting the joke. Everyone was having a jolly good, funny time, even Bilbo who was chuckling but then the smell hit us. We had reached the troll cave.

#

"What's that stench?" I heard Nori yell from inside the cave. ¾ of the company were waiting outside as the stink was horrendous and that meant that only a handful actually went in. Sansa and I were just lazing in the sun, a little away from the rest of the company.

"Brooke, you've never sung, talked or mentioned anything about _them_, until now. Why? Are you finally getting over it because I know it's what_ he_ would have wanted?" Sansa whispered to me and laid her head on my shoulder. I shrugged, even I didn't know the answer to that, it hurts too much to think about it but I know that soon I'd have to face my demons.

I silently stood up and took a peek inside the cave, looking at Bofur, Nori, Gloin and Dwalin who were near the entrance. The trio (Nori, Bofur and Gloin), were eyeing a chest full of precious metals and gems and some money lying around.

"Seems a shame just to leave it lying around. Anyone could take it" commented Bofur, twiddling his thumbs and looking at Gloin. Dwalin rolled his eyes and huffed, watching Thorin and Gandalf.

"Agreed. Nori, get a shovel" Gloin ordered Nori who went off and swiftly came running back with a shovel. They started digging a deep hole and when Dwalin looked at them, he was wearing a look of disgust as the trio lowered a chest full of gold.

"We're making a long term deposit" Gloin told Dwalin who grumbled a few words and backed out of the cave. "Let's get out of this foul place. Come on. Bofur! Gloin! Nori!" Thorin's baritone voice barked out and soon everyone was out of the cave.

"Brooklyn, I found something for you" Gandalf held out an ivory bow with gold plated tips and with a sapphire encrusted handle. He also found some ivory arrows and light brown leather quiver to put the arrows in.

"Thank you Gandalf" I smiled and took the beautiful weapons. Gandalf nodded back and went off the give Bilbo a small sword.

Sansa looked over my shoulder as I was admiring the archery set, her emerald eyes widened as she saw the gold and sapphires shimmering in the sun. "Oooh, preeetttyyyyy!" I chuckled at her response and slung the quiver over my shoulder and grasped onto the bow handle.

"Something's coming!" Thorin yelled out making everyone get into battle mode. "Stay together! Hurry now. Arm yourselves" Gandalf cried out and ran into the forest to the sound.

We stopped in a little clearing and everyone got into a circle, pushing Bilbo, Sansa and I to the middle. Even though I didn't like the fact that they thought that we weren't good fighters, I was glad that if something dangerous came running at us then I probably won't be the first person killed or injured. Mean but true.

All a sudden, mother fucking rabbits pulling a sleigh came racing out the forest and into our clearing. Fucking _rabbits _pulling a fucking _sleigh_. "Someone pinch me and tell me this isn't real" I whispered to the person closest to me, who happened to be Fili. He grinned then pinched my arm.

"Argh! You bitch! Not that hard!" I hissed at the childish prince who pulled his tongue out at me. We returned our attention to see Radagast the Brown come yelling.

"Thieves! Fire! Murder!" The wizard who looked after all the nature in the Greenwood shouted at the top of his lungs. Gandalf just looked shocked, "Radagast! Radagast the Brown! What on earth are you doing here?" he asked.

"Looking for you Gandalf. Something's wrong. Something's terribly wrong." Radagast hurriedly said. "Yes?" Gandalf questioned, walking closer to the worried wizard. Hey, that rhymed!

Radagast opened his mouth then shut it, eyebrows furrowed. That's when I noticed it. "Is that bird shit on his hair?" I whispered to the two princes and Sansa, shocked. Kili and Fili frowned, squinting harder at the bird shit on Radagast's hair whilst Sansa giggled. "I-I do believe that is bird shit as you politely put it" Kili answered, shocked and disgusted.

"Just give me a minute. Oh, I had a thought, and now I've lost it on the tip of my tongue Radagast commented and went cross-eyed and poked his tongue out making Sansa and I giggle more.

"Oh, it's not a thought at all; it's just a silly little-" Radagast poked his tongue out and Gandalf gently pulled a leaf insect out of the loony but cool wizard's mouth. "-stick insect!" Radagast finished and took the insect from Gandalf and put it on his hat.

"I want whatever he's smoking!" I leant my head and whispered to Sansa with wide eyes. "Remind me, if we ever get back to Australia, to get the strongest bag of weed there is" Sansa whispered back grinning. "You know Coulson would frown on that" I smirked back.

I looked over at the resting rabbits with a new found desire to pat them. I squeezed past muttering dwarves to the wary rabbits that looked at me curiously. I was never a Snow White or Princess Aurora or Cinderella myself but it seemed like the rabbits liked me.

I plopped down on the grass next to them and sent peals of laughter into the air as a few of them clambered onto me with their little pink noses twitching like mad. I patted them softly and tickled the leader of the pack behind his ear, making him make a cute noise. I smiled brightly at Fili, Kili, Ori, Bofur and Sansa who were looking at me with small grins on their faces.

#Kili's POV#

'When we get reclaim Erebor, I will get Brooke a whole farm of animals. She needs to be surrounded with them. They look happier around them and she looks happier around them too. She's definitely a nature girl. Maybe she's a witch because she has most definitely bewitched my heart. Oh, snap out of it Kili! What would Fili think if he heard you right now? He would call me a love-struck fool! But Brooke, she's so gorgeous, more than precious metals and stones. Her hair is the best shade of mahogany, a dark rich colour with natural red highlights that shine in the light. Her dark whiskey colored brown eyes, when in the sun, melt into golden rays, circling an eclipse, they turn into a sunset of their own!' I thought to myself. "I am such a fool" I muttered, ignoring the look my brother gave to me.

# Brooke's POV #

I was still on the ground with rabbits climbing all over me when I looked over at Gandalf and Radagast who were discussing 'wizard business' in a corner. I watched as Radagast took a long drag out of Gandalf's pipe and fall into a trance like state, going cross eyed. I snorted with laughter as smoke came out of the wizard's nostrils and ears.

"I thought ladies don't snort because it's very unladylike" Kili joked and reached his hand out to pat a rabbit only to have it bite him not so gently. I snorted again and burst out giggling as he sucked his bitten finger in his mouth with a slight pout.

"Aww! Does wittle baby Kili have a boo boo? Does Kili want a wittle kiss to make it better? Aww, come here bubba" I teased him and gently kissed his cheek. "Are you better now Kili?"

I joked and looked into his mesmerizing dark, soulful eyes. "Maybe it will be better if you give me a kiss here!" Kili adorably asked, with wide doe-eyes and pointed to his lips.

I snorted, "In your dreams" I answered and turned around with a flick of my hair. "Oh, you do more in my dreams!" Kili called out to me, making me blush a vibrant shade of pink. I turned around and Kili sent a flirtatious wink my way.

"Sweetheart, in my dreams I get to throttle you and Thorin high fives me after!" I crossed my arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow at Kili, wishing him to continue. He was going to until we heard a spine chilling howl.

"Was that a wolf? Are there wolves out here?" Bilbo asked, frightened and clutching his 'letter opener' tightly. "Wolves? No, that's not a wolf" Bofur said, walking backwards a bit with wide eyes.

A warg suddenly jumped out from a crag and knocked Sansa down. His black fur is matted with mud, its eyes were wild and crazy in a bad way and its jaws held sharp pointy teeth and it was drooling. Sansa tried to reach her sword but it was out of reach, as the warg was about to rip her throat out, Thorin came up and brought his sword, _Orcrist, _down in the beast's skull.

Another warg climbed onto a rock behind Thorin and was about to jump on him when Kili sent an arrow sailing through the air to it. It fell off the rock but got up only to be killed when Dwalin hit it with a gigantic war hammer.

"Warg-scouts! Which means an Orc pack is not far behind!" Thorin spat and glared at the dead warg carcasses with pure hatred. "Orc pack?" Bilbo squeaked out in fear, I felt so sorry for him, I had the urge to hug him and wrap him in fluffy blankets to protect him from all the evil of the world.

"Who did you tell about your quest, beyond your kin?" Gandalf interrogated Thorin, looking at the king beneath the mountain dead serious. "No one" Thorin answered, looking perplexed.

"Who did you tell?" Gandalf pushed and stalked closer to Thorin. "No one I swear, what in Durin's name is going on?" Thorin shouted, confused as ever.

"You are being hunted" Gandalf answered and frowned, very worried. "We have to get out of here!" Dwalin yelled and pushed in front of everyone.

"We can't! We have no ponies; they bolted!" Ori shouted as he ran down the gully to us. '_Damn, I really liked Nymeria and in the movie the company had to run and just because I'm a super spy and assassin doesn't mean I actually like running!' _I groaned at the thought.

"I'll draw them off!" Radagast exclaimed with excitement and started to walk to his rabbit drawn sleigh. "These are Gundobad wargs; they will outrun you" Gandalf tried to reason with the wizard who protected nature. "These are Rhosgobel rabbits; I'd like to see them try" And with that, Radagast the Brown hopped onto his sleigh like a badass and was off.

#

We hid behind a rock near the edge of the forest and watched as Radagast sped past the Orc pack on his rabbit drawn sleigh. "Come and get me! Ha ha!" He yelled and teased the Orcs and dashed through the forest and into the moors.

"Come on!" Gandalf yelled on led us onto the rocky plains. In the distance we could see the wargs and orcs chase Radagast but then the wizard turned and let the Orc pack a few rocks away forcing us to hide.

"Stay together!" Gandalf yelled and started running again only to force us to stop behind a rock as the Orc pack were lead nearby.

"Move!" Thorin shouted and we started running again but then Radagast led the Orc pack underneath an under-hanging rock and that forced us to stop behind another rock yet again but Ori kept on running. "Ori, no!" Thorin yelled and dragged the philosopher by the back of his shirt into the cover of the rock.

"Come on! Quick!" Gandalf yelled and started leading us on and out into the open. "Where are you leading us?" I heard Thorin shout to Gandalf but the wizard didn't answer. Sansa and I already knew where Gandalf was trying to lead us to, we were going to Rivendell.

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Hey guys, sorry for not updating in a while. I've been very busy. Well, this chapter has not been edited since I'm posting this before class starts. urgh, I've got PE. Please rate and review. 

~JM Stannard


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